Silent Wishes

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Silent Wishes

This monotony of me on me
is not enough to set me free

My mind is still so fucking frantic,
and I’m still so very heartsick

Why can’t I just not be sober
‘til this nauseous feeling’s over?

Why can’t I just let you be,
and distract all this lust in me?

I guess it’s just the way I’m built,
I’m not quite right, my axis tilts

I feed off my imagination
Just to get a new sensation

Let my thoughts flail & my mind race
Let my skin flush, quickened pulse pace

Hide from these truths all the while
in my crush filled sweet denial

Most days, though, I want this over
Thinkin’ ‘bout that four leaf clover

Pledge my head to clearer thinking
just to keep my heart from sinking

Give my hands to greater service,
and faintly wish that I deserve him